Dear Seeking 1178,
Please allow me to introduce myself, my name is Mary. I am contacting you because I have noticed that you have not had a date, or shall I say a successful date since 2009. I know this because you have been on Match.com for at least that long. Every time I open my yahoo email account there you are with about six other prospects on the right side of my screen. Your still smiling and it is the same head shot. I will tell you in case you haven’t noticed, you have been moved to a smaller box and have been replaced by Trevor 7878. His picture now is in the larger “featured” spot which you dominated for so many years.
Trevor 7878 is very handsome as well but the good news is that his face is covered with a box titled “View Single Men in Philadelphia” with little title boxes below asking to SELECT AGE AND NEAR ZIP. The final box, which might be a problem is VIEW PHOTOS OF MEN, I know, the competition. I think you are very very handsome with that tan model face, perfectly white teeth that gleam when you smile and those twinkling blue eyes that shine brighter than all the stars in the sky. You are dreamy. You look very clean-cut and must make money if you can continue to renew your account yearly. By now you must have spent hundreds of dollars on this site. That money could have easily been spent in other ways that I assure you would get your needs met and maybe in the process fell in love.
I don’t understand why you have not found your match? One reason could be that you do have “stiff” competition. For example Vegas 90403 is dark and handsome. I don’t know how tall he is, or you either, because you both are just heads in your photos. Vegas 90403’s face is tan like yours and has facial hair (mustache and goatee). He looks like a bad boy so that could be trouble. Women like bad boys, think Johnny Depp. You, Seeking 1178, are the Brad Pitt type so it is like comparing apples and oranges. You’re both fruit your just the different flavors.
There are a few other heads showing as well but I want to help you. The one thing that Trevor 7878 has that you and Vegas 90403 don’t is information about his interests. Trevor 7878 likes coffee and conversation, dining out, movies/videos, music and concerts, playing sports, watching sports and travel/sightseeing. Personally they are generic and nothing to write home about. What are your interests? I would image jumping out of airplanes, traveling to exotic places like El Calafate, Argentina, The Galapagos Islands or one of my favorites Phuket, and learning different languages. Do you like to travel, do you like coffee, do you like watching sports? Who are you Seeking 1178? Unless you drool when you eat, have noticeable ear wax or spit when you talk, I can only think of two reasons you are not successful at love. You are a perpetual playboy devoted chiefly to the pursuit of pleasurable activities, the cat on the prowl type or you suffer from a syndrome known as “fear of commitment”.
Being a playboy is great if that makes you happy. It’s a free country go out and serial date! I caution you to always be upfront and honest with the women you date and tell them the truth. You don’t want to be a heart breaker or get a reputation as a womanizer. We women know, we smell it on you. The second reason is problematic, “fear of commitment” known as commitment-phobia. Don’t worry you are not alone. Thousand of men suffer silently with this condition. Perhaps Trevor 7878 and Vegas 90403 are afflicted as well. Maybe you three should exchange numbers and set up a date to talk about it. If you like I would be happy to help all three of you, for a fee, address this issue once diagnosed. I am very familiar with this condition both personally (his side) and professionally, but back to you.
Here is a brief summary of commitment-phobia. This is a common condition that manifests in romantic life. The afflicted , that would be you Seeking 1178, want to find love and get married but fail. Ironically what you crave you fear most, love and connection. This is a confusing and destructive cycle of seduction and rejection. This is based in FEAR. To keep it simple, you think the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. This thinking makes you feel trapped forever. Remember there are options available, take Newt Gingrich for example, he wants the lifestyle known as an open marriage. Many people choose this, there are conventions held annually in Los Vegas for fellowshipping. I’m sure Vegas 90403 would be happy to host you and perhaps attend the event as well. There is also divorce, which we know is now common and then good old-fashioned cheating. All three, in my opinion are destructive and don’t advocate any of them but the point is, you’re not powerless. You have choices.
So I ask you Seeking 1178, do you think you have a problem? The first step is acceptance and it’s ok, there is help. I will help you. I know this realization can be frightening and unsettling but continuing down this dead-end road of serial dating, spending hundreds of dollars on the wrong site and being constantly displayed as a failure on Match.com is not going to satisfy you in the end when you are 86 years old, alone, and wearing a diaper that someone you don’t know has to change as they steal your money. Life is very hard Seeking1178, don’t do it alone. Sincerely,